pack it up

Nobody warned us that packing with a toddler means that while your back is turned grabbing stuff to pack in a box they're behind you, emptying it as fast as they can. Our bedroom is all finished but somehow in our haste we’ve managed to create the world’s coolest climbing maze which has us now enrolling her in gymnastics.
Every event is a chance to discover something new and play with it. And not to be outdone, how do we now spell fun; t a p e g u n.

A Wee Little Worm

A wee little worm in a hickory-nut

Sang, happy as he can be,
"O I live in the heart of the whole round world,
And it belongs to me!"
-James Whitcomb Riley

Hope you all have a fantastic Memorial Day weekend full of smiles, relaxing moments, surprises, and joy. Hug, love, and laugh, great grandma is coming to town!

Let's Box

Countdown to moving day has begun, one more week at the old place and because I’m so insanely organized I have officially packed three boxes already, in my mind. Mental packing is a lot harder than regular packing because you always forget what you’ve put in the box. Hmm, maybe I need to start mentally labeling.
Special shout out to O'Dette who was born twenty minutes ago. Through the marvels of modern connective-ness I almost feel like I was there.

eep op ope

I’ve accepted the fact that there are some words I’ll never be able to spell. The word ‘exercise’ is one of them. I get to trying to spell that word sometimes and I’m up to twenty-five letters before I give up. Spell check can’t even find a word that comes close when I’m done. Don’t fret, I’ll have my revenge.
Raisins; It's all she wants, all she thinks about, all she can talk about. One little box and her world has been changed... forever.

scaling down

In the last nine months I have lost seventy pounds. Yeah, I'm serious. No, I didn't use some overpriced magic pill. I did it the old fashioned way, blech. Not done though, I have fifteen more pounds to go before I reach my first goal. The steps in between weight loss and world domination are a little fuzzy but you can work that out later.It's instinctual, kids just know. I mean they literally come out of the womb and instantly know how to play 'fort'. It's amazing.

patent pending

I've found my niche market. Drug sniffing dogs, but instead of drugs they look for kidnapped kiddie socks. I know right? Who doesn't want to borrow my dog? All this because I went to get the mail and babe’s sock wasn’t found till eight hours later. It was behind the lawn mower which really ties our living room together.Today I've already said, "No honey that's not the end you talk into when you want the cat to listen." It's going to be an exciting day I just know it.

Top 5

Top 5 cool things about today 5) National Tap Dance Day, oh yeah! 4) Ralph Waldo Emerson is 207 years old, niiiiiice! 3) 9 years ago Erik Weihenmayer climbed Mt. Everest, he's blind and awesome! 2) Kennedy pledged to put a man on the moon, rock on! 1) Last but never least, Happy Birthday Mom, I love you!The energy ratio of toddler to adult is skewed for one reason and one reason only, toddlers cheat, they get a nap.

Zzzzzzzzz

I dreamt last night that I was trying to remember who stole from a dream I dreamt months ago which could only happen by re-dreaming a section of a dream from two nights ago. So, now I know what happened to the missing piece of the scroll and the scorpion dice. And this of course is all relevant to my current mission.The distortion on baby monitors can take the simple act of pulling a bear through crib slats and make it sound like my babe has taken up bowling.

talk to me people

If you Myspace my Facebook, I'll Twitter your Livejournal. No, no, no, Wordpress, my Blogger and I'll Tumblr for sure. Just don't forget to Stumble my Digg while you Delicious my Friendster. But wait, you never Technorati my Reddit while I Stumble a Designfloat in RSS Feed, don't forget. Not to be outdone... but I could use a nap.
Meanwhile in toddler speak, whining has quickly replaced most adjectives, nouns replaced by gestures, and verbs with stuff animals= "whaaaaahh, whoosh, Elmo!"

kertsychoo

Ugh, it feels like something incredible cute and equally fuzzy just crawled up my nose and died. The oozing from the eyes is just lovely, combine that with the nose leakage and I sound like an old hippo in distress. I’m a consummate allergy sufferer that’s no longer able to breathe. It must be really beautiful out.Ball in the house, ball on you, ball on the wall, ball in my shoe, ball over the chair, ball in the air, ball over here, ball over there.

.p.e.r.i.o.d.

Let me preface by saying that attitude can be everything. My ‘cup’ is neither half full nor half empty. I’ve never looked at it that way and I probably never will. My attitude is simply this; I’m just over the moon to have a cup in the first place. And I’m pleased as punch to announce that I have in fact gotten a period, fashionably late, but ever present.It's awfully hard to get away with blaming the cat for knocked over goodies when there's a pulled up kiddie step stool.

sticky situation

Gave my babe a 17 year old roll of colored masking tape because it’s lost most of its stick, I’m a fun mom, and who doesn’t like playing with the world’s longest sticker. Ground rules are now being made: 1) Don’t tape the cat 2) Don’t tape your food, or my food, or any food for that matter 3) DON’T TAPE THE CAT.
Eeek, oops, oh my goodness, oh my goodness, oh my goodness, babe just found yet another use for the tape, gotta run.

good times

I had to go to my father-in–law to borrow a weed whacker. Why, because MY father knows better. Man, I should not be allowed to play around with one of these things. Oooohhhh I wonder if he owns a chain saw. Boyfriend get the camera, neighbors duck for cover, and babe start screaming riiiiighhhtt about NOW.Attempting to instill values and ideas in our daughter has taught me one thing, piano IS way more fun when you practice with your toes.

Fortune 500

Whoo hoo 500 followers! Thanks folks, have you lost weight? Hey there skinny mini! No really, looking good. And in garden related news I have found my green thumb saboteur. Infernal feline, you're lucky you're cute because otherwise I would be having you replant those berries you so lovingly relocated to the neighbor's yard.Babe has currently upped the creativity with her naptime stalling tactics. Instead of crying "water or potty" we now have "pickle and doggie" and we don't even own a dog.

time well spent

Because our priorities match our maturities we can be found at the park working on our swing dismount or snuggled up with a really good children's book. Yes, we own a TV, but we don't have TV and we've seen guests shake from withdrawals because they can't watch their nightly news. Play-Doh is the only known remedy.Delegation gone awry; uncle got to cut shapes for babe's new felt board. I was thinking circles, he was thinking monsters, silly me.

fruitless

So, I did not in fact ovulate. Pills aren't working since fallopian tube has been removed, but I guess that's moot right now because I really don't want to be loading up moving boxes, prepping my daughter's second birthday blowout (man folks love a small fry shindig) all the while not wearing pants. It would just be awkward.
When toy tables become step stools then my babe has found yet another way to induce Papa panic and make Mama clean. Thanks for the award Natalie. I adore you!

Chisel? Swivel Knife? Osteotome?

I feel like a neurosurgeon. A neurosurgeon that needs a hard hat and traction tongs, you know, best to be prepared for anything. Yes, we're STILL cleaning our bedroom closet. Live in fear. I'm not losing sleep, but as I carefully dissect each item that comes into the light I now realize forceps aren't what I need; this requires hazmat suits and a nail gun.
Ah yes, what's cuter then a toddler dressing them self; a toddler dressing them self in the dark. Hehehehe, ahem, blackmail photos. Congrats to my 14 Shutterfly Coupon winners!

He answers to Butters.

We have a neighborhood cat. He takes on ALL life forms. His owners are at wits end and have begun to hang a plethora of mini bells around his neck to warn others of his appending approach. Yesterday he attacked a car. From a distance it sounded like Santa had found new transportation. I've now found my Christmas spirit.Our babe tap dances to the sound of our vacuum cleaner. I've decided not to question her judgment but instead join in. Corroborating evidence isn't needed. Thanks for the honest award Agnes!

I've got it!

Love what you do, do what you love. Last night it hit me. I finally know what I want to be when I grow up. Wait for it.... bubble bath tester. Mmmm divine. I can't wait. So, who's hiring? Ooh, don't forget to enter my Shutterfly giveaway because there's going to be 14 winners and odds are good you might know one of them.Here I thought my babe was giving our wall a standing ovation just turns out she was clapping the dust in the light. Hey, great construction needs love too. Thanks for the sweet award Rachel!

setting torpedos to Phase One

Travel to exciting and strange new worlds. Visit friends you haven't seen in months. Bring a camera because this will be spoken of and written about for years. History books will dedicate whole chapters in our name. Yep, that's right; we're cleaning out our bedroom closet. Recruitment posters are now being put up and names written down; Step inside, join the adventure.
Potty training day 15451; our babe now finishes her routine with a post lavatory sprint. Wiping while running has become 2nd nature; yesterday I took silver. Thanks Peggy for the sweet award!

movin' on up

We found a house... to rent. Yeah, we move quickly. It's a cutie little 3 bedroom, 1 bath that gives great backyard. We're putting a hold deposit on it tonight. Ready for the best news? Are you? We're moving the same weekend as our babe's birthday bash. I've always had great timing. Now where is my day planner?
Always thought I wanted hard wood floors and then I met my daughter. She's the most fun thing on two feet that couldn't stay vertical even if she tried.

buyer beware

So, this was the month we began the house hunt. It has been canceled, indefinitely, for a multitude of reasons, 1) inability to agree on future kitchen color (I say: "olive", Boyfriend says: "adobe") 2) folks of our maturity level really aren't ready to own 3) financial backer for all ludicrous endeavors still hasn't been located.Licking crayons while coloring the sofa still continues to climb the charts as being the #1 activity to get away with when Mama's busy. #2 is potty training the cat.

Merry Mother's Day!

I would like to dedicate this post to all the Mamas out there who haven't met their little kiddos yet. Whatever path you choose to accomplish this goal will be the right one for you. And you need to know that I will be rooting for you every step of the way! In the meantime, breathe, smile, and hug your partner.

This is MY mother's favorite Mother's Day video. Enjoy!

my weakness

I'm so attached to bread of the charred persuasion that folks hang their head in shame at the very mention. Many a toaster has been killed in the wake of my devoted breakfast addiction that an intervention is now being considered. It's gotten so bad lately that the only way I know my morning meal is truly done is by the smoke alarm.Just about anything will be done by our daughter to receive a precious bye-oon (balloon), why she'd even consider saying "please". Thanks for the versatile awards Jackie!

well-kept

Something is in the air... whew weeeeeee. I've begun to clean, and not just a 'wash the dishes' kinda clean, but a 'good grief what in the world is in the corner of this closet that we haven't opened in two years' clean. I'm finding all kinds of stuff I never knew I ever wanted, or purchased. My advice, run, save yourself, I'm never gonna make it.'Why' really means 'y' when it's being shouted out in battle cry formation by my babe. Never forget to duck; magnetic letters are more aerodynamic than advertised.

** Shutterfly Giveaway** because my followers rock! GIVEAWAY NOW CLOSED!

I have 14 coupons for a *free 20-page 8x8 photo book with hard cover which also includes a coupon for 12 *free 5x7 folded greeting cards at Shutterfly (*free = Taxes, shipping and handling may apply.) to give away. So follow my blog and leave me a comment on this post saying whether you're a new follower or a previous follower (so I know who to add back) and include your email address.
One entry per blogger, contest ends next Thursday (May 13th at 6:11pm). Arbitrary, random numbers are so much fun and check out Shutterfly here and here.

weather permitting

Gardening folks, that's where I've been. I have a propensity to purchase plants based on my idea of what their personality would be like if they were in fact not a plant which leads to a great accumulation of non-native, non area tolerant, poisonous, weeds of national significance, but it's the ones that look like candy that compromise my wallet first.
Our babe adores this plant and screams "nom nom nom" every time she comes within five feet. That's my girl, though restraining orders are now being filed.

Tomorrow...

begins the one month countdown to my daughter's second birthday and I'm still trying to get things ready; potty trained, check, absurd quantity of invites, check, park for which to host the kiddie chaos, check, bottle of bubbles for each child larger than their head, check, menu to feed the masses, check, longest sentence ever, check.
Sometimes I just have to turn to my daughter and ask "Where is your mother while you're doing all this?" I have yet to receive an answer, but I'm sure it's really good.

just the facts

So I literally have no fertility news to report which is sort of like having actual news without actually having actual news. It's just a lot of waiting. Did I ovulate? Will I get my period? Are the drugs really working? Do I need more drugs? What wouldn't I do for a Klondike bar? Which are all very valid very relevant questions.Paddington Bear's new cohort in crime is Elmo. An unlikely matched pair that can be found most often going for a swim, in our toilet.

The Madness

I'm mad at you. Oooh, you got your haircut. Why are you mad at me? You look handsome. Why are you mad at me? Well, I'm mad at you because I'm no longer mad at you because you look hot with your haircut. Okay. And so on and so forth but this is how it goes. We have proof. We have cooperative witnesses. No, um, I should clarify; she's actually not slapping herself in the face, no that's just her way of blowing you a kiss with enthusiasm.

Gearing up to get down.

I'll be honest; I'm more of a wok cook then a cake baker and I'm quite certain that this disaster shaped in a cake pan was of my own delegation and design. Again, who let this happen? Why has no one tried to stop me? Happy belated birthday to the coolest dad in the world now lets party!
Researchers are still studding why gravity for toddlers intensifies in severity as a direct result of not getting what they want when they want it.

There is something I need to say...

I have been quietly, patiently, holding my tongue on this topic, but I'll do so no longer. So, here goes, our bath toy situation is getting out of hand and I'm quite certain that the Big Bad Wolf never pictured his evenings being submerged in warm water surrounded by an alligator, a duck that's dressed as a mummy AND dozens more.
Its quality not quantity people. We need to reel it in, not just for the Big Bad Wolf's sake, but for the alligator and the mummy duck who also want quality time with our babe.